Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Dear Lady Who Told My Deaf Son to Be Quiet

I'm sorry he's loud. I know. We're working on it. He may not have heard your words of venom, but the glare on your face said it all. Even though you didn't know his story, you rushed to judge. Let me tell you Junior's story.

After my son was born I had sadly resigned him to a life of silence. I heard the word "deaf" and my world was crushed. Hope was lost. My precious baby boy was a birth defect statistic. The world I had envisioned for him was gone, and he would forever be labeled with a disability.

Months and months of doctor's appointments confirming his diagnosis, and buckets of my tears later, he received the most incredible gift any person could ever receive--the gift of sound. Our baby endured a long surgery to have electrodes and magnets placed in his little body, he endured pain and pain medicine and antibiotics. He endured doctors poking and prodding, and appointments and being woken up from naps and being taken away from Curious George. He endured hours in the car and way too many meals of apple slices and chicken nuggets because his momma was just too tired. He's endured feeling "different" and having people stare. He always offers strangers a smile, but people are rarely kind enough to smile back because they're too busy staring.

But now, because of the gift he was given, he can finally hear his own voice. He's only loud because he can hear. His world is no longer silent. We're working on the volume, we really, really are. And that adds another therapy into his already overscheduled little life. We try to avoid stores and restaurants, but today, while I stood in line to get my children a cookie as a special treat, you felt inconvenienced and saw it your place to reprimand me.

And yet, you didn't care to ask his story. You just told me to make him quiet. I was hurt and stunned, but what I really should have done was tell you what a blessing it was that you were able to hear his voice. That your ears work, that you were already born with the gift of sound. Because while he can be loud, that little voice is a miracle and I will never take it for granted.

Read Junior's Story

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  1. Oh God what insensitive people we have in this world. Hugs and kisses to you, this is my fear for my daughter that she will be judged by the insensitive ignorant people of this world. Love you and your son.

  2. And to your son, keep on being loud sweetheart, the sound of your voice is proof that miracles still happen. Xoxox

    1. Thank you Shereen. Your words are so kind. It is my hope that we can tell everyone how incredible these little Bionic Babies are. Best of luck to you and your daughter!

  3. While at a western museum gift shop when my daughter was only a year old and hadn't had her CI very long she was being a bit noisy and I overheard a lady tell her friend she wished we would "shut that baby up". My dad overheard it as well and got very upset. He told her that she is his grandbaby and she is deaf and doesn't know how loud she is. Sorry that happened to you. You are definitely not alone! She is now 6 and is doing amazing. Can't even tell she was born deaf.

  4. I don't like loud people, but I hate ignorant and inconsiderate people. This is like telling someone who just picked up a flute and played their first note that they are airy and out of tune. How discouraging is that? People shouldn't be so quick to judge.

  5. While our children do not share the same challenges, we have been the recipients of selfish and judgmental bystanders. I have not always been as gracious to them as you were to this woman. Ignorant comments hurts. Probably hurts us moms more than our oblivious kids. Your little guy is a sweet blessing!

  6. I wish you had not experienced this woman's ignorance. People are sometimes so completely self consumed.

  7. My heart sunk as I read this. Love that you are sharing his story here and that you're embracing it all as a blessing. You're an amazing mother!

  8. Wow! Thanks for sharing! We are a CC family so I love your game ideas. We have 3 kids and our 2 youngest have CI's.


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